Thursday, June 23, 2011

Hard Habit to Break....

Four years, two months, two weeks ago I met the man that would change me forever. He was not the first man I ever loved, nor will he be the last. We loved hard, fought even harder. Until I met him I had never loved another person so wholeheartedly and unconditionally. There were no secrets, nothing held back. There are days I miss him so much I can't breathe. I know that finally getting him out of my life was the best thing I could do for myself, but it has been a battle. I can't fix the parts of him that are broken. I can love him with all my heart, but I can never change him. And I honestly don't think he will ever change. He will be 40 in a few months. The one thing I hope for him is that he realizes there is a reason why women leave him, that he can't take people for granted in his life. He has to reconcile his issues within himself. I was his security blanket for too damn long, and I had to stop being there to pick up the pieces. So I survived, my heart a little worse for the wear. I feel more at peace than I have in a very long time. I had to put an end to him popping back up and trying to charm his way back into my life. He can't get to me anymore!!

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